My friend Sarah came to visit a few weekends ago. We had a few drinks at a bar on Thursday night and then Friday we went to an antique store to find goodies for her vintage kitsch collection. After our visit to the downtown antique store we went to a local coffee joint to have a coffee and some good conversation.
We hit topics such as: politics, abortion, religion, spirituality, gay rights, the economy... it was a good convo. 'Specially fun because we weren't defending our stance on issues but sharing our beliefs. Out of the corner of my eye I saw this young (younger than us) girl sitting at her computer. I later told Sarah I KNEW she was listening, and Sarah said she saw her look up at us a few times. She started packing up to go and sure enough stopped at our table.
She was shaking. She went on to say that she had overheard our conversation. She went into a personal story of struggles, fear of crazy religious people, to a moment of clarity, to a church parking lot, to being welcomed by the church members, to a personal relationship with Jesus, to inviting us to her church. Her story was compelling and sweet. Sarah and I could relate to her moment of clarity and her fear of crazy religious people. I can relate to her personal relationship with Jesus (I don't want to speak for Sarah) and her wanting to share what has worked for her with others.
Scandalicous Suburbia is my testimony to the choices and beliefs that have worked for me. I fully realize that I have opened myself up by blogging in that I could potentially have many readers. Or I could be blogging to only 1 reader - me. Either way, once written it is not my choice who reads this blog. People find me and visit me for a number of different reasons I am sure, "becoming a hippie" is topping the list so far of readers that find me through Google.
I don't hold any expectations of my blog changing minds or lives. I don't sit around hoping that my blog gets read by thousands of people and makes me famous. Blogging isn't meant to be my life's work, I know that. But I still enjoy it. It's fun & I do it for me, really. I do it to process my thoughts and live who-I-am out-loud, something I didn't do much of until recently. So, if you read it, you may hear me talk about Byron Katie and The Work because her process on how to live in the moment changed my life. You might hear me mention TUT, the website that sends me a fabulous, funny daily email from The Universe. I have read and loved Seth books by Jane Roberts, Eckhart Tolle, Neale Donald Walsch, Don Miguel Ruiz (specifically The Voice of Knowledge), Wayne Dyer, Pema Chodron, The Tao Te Ching, M. Scott Peck (specifically Further Along The Road Less Traveled), and A Course in Miracles to name a few. These people/books may all get mentioned on my blog because it is MY blog and they were enlightening and important to my path.
What I do not understand is the belief that some hold that their way of life (their choice of religion/books/beliefs/etc) is the only way of life and should be a one size fits all for everyone. What happens when we begin proselytizing to other people is that we begin to look naive, closed minded and cold. The political tactic of making the other guy look bad has never sat well with me, no matter what party. Why aren't politicians talking about what they will bring to the office instead of what the other guy won't bring? And religion: I have known people who hoped to bring followers to their religion, talk to the potential converts like they are stupid and naive, somehow not ready for the "one truth", & disappointing The Lord until the moment they join the "one true" church. The girl that told us HER church was the place that WE could find healing, believed that with all of her heart and stated in simply and lovingly. When she left I loved her for being so brave as to share her sorrowful and triumphant story with two strangers. An amazing testimony from her soul. It was her story about her path to freedom. I can hear it and love her. I don't have to make it her story about my path to freedom.
I have my own story about me. I have shared parts of it here, on Scandalicious Suburbia. I have shared it openly. I don't expect everyone to agree with me. I don't hope for anything specific by sharing it. For me, it's about opening up to Life. Just by writing and clicking "Publish Post" I am opening myself up to the world. I have learned that when I do this the world opens itself up to me, too. However, my sense of self, my passion, my heart is not wrapped up in the comments or the feedback or how many new friends I receive or people I convert to my way of thinking. My self-identity is only wrapped up in Me. How I feel. What I think about. Whether I am being loving, open, and kind to myself. It's only when I am being good to myself that I can be good to others. I play my music and others benefit (if they like the sound of it, that is). Changing my music to theirs to win them over makes no sense and making people change their music to mine to gain followers is loveless.
This video, from Abraham (another of my favorites), is an amazing testimony, for me, to the value of living Your Life without expectations and judgements of others.
5 comments:
That was a good post. Lots of fodder for discussion. Great video, too. (Also, I can't help but wonder if I came up in your conversation with Sarah. :-)
First, I just want to point out the implication of this linguistic arrangement: "crazy religious people" by comparing it to "religious people who are crazy". The first implies that all religious people are crazy. It's ambiguous. And when discussing sensitive topics, I think it's best to avoid all ambiguity. I know you were quoting this woman. Still, I wanted to point out that the second arrangement would have been more forgiving.
Secondly, I hope you know, as my friend, that the purpose of my blog is not to change people into being more like me, in any way. My purpose is to create understanding and compassion toward people. If they want to become more like me, that would great in some ways. But I don't try to create it and I certainly don't try to force it.
There ARE people who proselytize because they believe there is an ultimate truth they want everyone to know and they don't care if people think they're naive, close-minded or cold. It's worth it to them because they believe in something bigger.
I loved that video. I loved much of what she had to say. That woman, her NAME isn't Abraham, is it? I thought she and her husband ran that, or something. Anyway, isn't what she said what both you and I have been saying for a while? We don't have to change the way other people think to be happy and to live our own lives fully.
Diversity is wonderful. I enjoy it very much. But most people don't, I dare say. And doesn't that in itself suggest that IF everyone WAS Mormon, for example, that it wouldn't be unpleasant? People naturally gravitate to people who are more like them. Sure, they enjoy being with different folks for a time. But the ones they choose to live their lives with are usually people who are like them. So, the idea that we could all be Mormon and be happy is not evil or crazy. It doesn't eliminate all diversity. It would only be miserable if forced. And we have no desire to share our beliefs with people who don't want to hear.
I'll be using that video on my blog in the future.
Great post!! (Facebook is not letting me know when you're posting anymore.)
And when I say that "I hope that you know", I'm pretty confident that you know. Just wanted to make sure there wasn't secret doubt in the back of your mind or something. :-)
Why can't I hear the video? The mouths are moving but no sound? I have my volume all the way up?!?!?!
Probably something overtly obvious that I am not doing- I'm sure I'll figure it out...
I assume you were at Water Street? I miss Kzoo these days...
It was an intersting post. Your posts have always seemed to come from within you, not from who you think people want to hear from. Which is why I think they are always so interesting and so... uninhibited (the swinger post comes to mind or the masturbation mention if we are going down like the titanic)!!
Keep it up girlfriend!
I really enjoy reading your blog because you DO have different opinions and views than me. Its the differences that actually draw me in, not the similarities... How boring would it be if we were all the same? Whats more, you always state your ideas in an intelligent manner and never in a domineering tone.
For whatever reasons you write your blog, I hope you continue to write. Your intelligence and humor is refreshing and addictive- (!)
I am new to your blog but we seem to have read the same books and dig the same people. (I make kitty purrs when I hear Wayne Dyer speak. His voice drives me...oh wait where was I going with this?)
Anyhoo, I dig your blog. Keep it up!
Found the mute button pressed on my computer. Now I can hear the video-
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